its been a while since ive even thought about her …

yet last night i had a dream about girl … it was not a sweet dream … it wasnt a awesome dream …

nor was it a crazy dreams like those that i have had before …

she was in a car crash … and had died …

i personally know for sure that i have no more feelings for her …

yet when i knew that she had died … i cried …

i cried until i have no sound … i cried until i cant …

just that feeling of losing a friend … she might not take me as a friend … and i totally understand …

the things i did to her to get her attention were stupid …

but the thought of losing a friend is unbareable …

the dream i swore was so real … i thought of everything being real …

so much that once i had the chance i texted her to see if she’s ok … kind of in a denial stage …

once i sent the message … i thought to myself … wait this cant be right …

why am i on my bed …

then i remember it was all a dream … ive been sleeping all along …

she did later reply … although … she was just asking who i am …

once i told her she didnt bother replying me …

which is sort of a relief … atleast she’s not dead right ???

right …

this is probably the most unethical … most immoral post i have ever wrote … (or not)

truth is … love is hard … if you want to love someone … and love that special someone forever …

you will have to sacrifice … alot … and sacrifice will not nessecarily reward you …

you could give up your family … so she can be with her’s

you could get the worse but best paying job ever … so she doesnt have to work …

you could donate all your organs to her … so she’ll live …

and you will still not have sacrificed enough …

keep in mind … love involves both parties … its both ways …

like Newton’s law … whatever you have sacrificed for her … she would have sacrificed the same for you

could you bare to see her sacrifice for you ?

could you bare to see her go through pain for you ?

what if you can never make her happy … never give her fortune and wellbeing …

what if you end up ruining her life …

then is your love for her worth it …

the person you want to embrace … the person you want to love … the person you want to protect …

is shattered before your eyes … because of your doing …

is your love worth it ??

so why not love her … but love her from a distance …

love her but never hurt her … to protect her …

hold and embrace another if you need so she wont be hurt by you …

so she cant be hurt by you …